Monday, October 13, 2014

Overcoming Negativity: Day 12: Get Tough


Today's Challenge: 
Stop hating yourself
Do not welcome self-pity into your life.


Seems like kind of a harsh topic, and maybe a bit extreme.

But from what I've observed over the years, 

...most people just don't like themselves.

"Yeah, but I don't hate myself," you say. Maybe not. Maybe you just don't like the way you look. Maybe you're unhappy with the way you handle things, or dislike a personality trait that you can't seem to change. Do you ever find yourself saying any of these?
  • "I just hate when I..." 
  • "That's just the way I am. I can't change."
  • "I wish I was more like..." 
  • "I'm such an idiot."
  • "I can't do anything right."
Maybe you don't loathe yourself. But you loathe certain aspects about yourself. The ironic thing about self-loathers is that they often give the impression that they're so "together." The reality is that they are dying inside, afraid that someone will discover that they're a fraud. Do you ever feel like that?

Step 4 in Leaving the Land of Negativity is getting tough with yourself.

I'm not one for patting people on the back, tsk-tsking and saying, "I understand." Because I don't. Why would you want to stay in something that keeps you miserable? I guess when God was handing out grace, I was busy talking, so I got extra chutzpah. 

You won't change by staying in Self-Pityville. That town has one street with one lane that goes one way. Lane changing and U-turns are illegal in Self-Pityville. And you know what? After awhile, people get tired of visiting you there.

It's not that I don't empathize or even understand. I do! Because I was once the mayor of Self-Pityville.

But I woke up one day and realized that it was time to leave. 

The bottom line is that it all comes down to self. 

Self-loathing and self-pity are both self-serving.

Whether you think too highly of yourself or not highly enough, if you're wrapped up in yourself too much, then you're serving yourself. 

Self-esteem is overrated.

We will never find satisfaction in ourselves. We are too flawed. And we will eventually disappoint ourselves when we mess up again.

Either accept those things about yourself or ask the One who created you to change you. God accepts you for who you are. He fashioned you to be uniquely you.

It's one of the highest forms of praise to thank God for giving you life. Equally, it's one of the highest insults to God to hate yourself because you're telling God, "What you made wasn't good."

And that's simply not true. What did God say at the end of each day when He was finished creating? 

He didn't say, "Well, it's okay. I could have done better. The one I made last week was much better. I just can't ever seem to get it right. I hate that I'm like this!"

No! He said, "That's good!" (paraphrased).

And on the sixth day, after he made man, he said, "Wow, that's really good!" (paraphrased again).

That's what God said when he made you. So who are you to hate what God made?

Get tough with yourself. Stop hating yourself. Accept and appreciate the beauty of you. 

Blessings Along the Path,

Sharing today with Barbie at Weekend Brew


  1. Thank you for linking up over at The Weekend Brew. Negative self talk is something I've struggled with all of my life. I know that it grieves God's heart when I talk baldy about myself. I am still working on it. Blessings!

    1. Yes, but there is also no condemnation for those of us in Christ Jesus. So, even though He is grieved, we are not to heap more guilt on ourselves when we do talk negatively! Thank God for grace! Thanks for taking the time to visit, Barbie.